Mildert B: 71 for 3 after 9.0 overs

Mildert B won by 5 wickets

The Bees scored an emphatic victory in their first LMS match ever at Millwall Park. It must be said first and foremost that the opposition was pretty substandard (5 accountants who didn’t play much and 3 kids drafted in from a nearby school by the umpire) but that’s never stopped Mildert B getting beaten before, so something must have gone right.

The pitch was reminiscent of the Viv Richards stadium in Antigua being more sand than grass, and the artificial track had obviously been laid over a trampoline as even the tamest of balls got up a bit. All balls came from one end (due to the track being rubbish)and one spot in particular outside off stump caused a couple of “big” moments for the batsmen. Mildert B looked the very picture of sartorial elegance in the kit provided (red, pics to follow) as the match began.

Tradition dictated that the Bees fielded first and it didn’t take Atko long to have the opening batsmen out as he removed his middle stump. Stu, making his debut behind the stumps, did a sterling job of preventing the usual wides from Peach and Beecham harming the score much, and although a couple of fours were leaked (you know who) all in all the Bees fielded pretty tightly. Ally ‘The Tewkesbury Airstrike’ Gray made his bowling debut in tandem with Revo Lewis and the noodley one took a wicket in his first over. New boy Hodgson continued to be more economical than a bulk buy supermarket, and we even got a slip catch (Beecham doing the work off Kirk’s bowling). There were wickets for all the bowlers in fact, and the Firestarters were all out for a pretty paltry 68 inside the 20 overs.

Graymeister General and Stu were sent in to open the batting, and the FSA must have been slightly optimistic as they had Bromley’s greatest land baron out first ball, followed rapidly by Captain Lewis, stumped off a horrible delivery outside off stump. However, they hadn’t bargained on the awesome hitting power of Stu, who smacked a few fours and one giant six over midwicket in a Gilchrist-esque 24 off 11 balls. Beech and Peach were left to see home Mildert in the fading light, with “Napier” playing some fine strokes whilst Kirk managed to chinese -cut himself to a streaky 13 not out that Boycs would have wept at.

Last Man Stands turned out to be MINT, and as Spewy Lewis pointed out: It is cricket for idiots. Perfect.

We have 2 matches next week: Wednesday at Millwall Park and Thursday at Southwark Park (both 6.30). We need players so get your names down. Cost = £10.

RAK

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